To the Men…

paper-535969_1280Dear Men,

It’s international women’s day today. A day when the world acknowledges women and their pivotal role in society. A day when we can stand up and proudly say that we are strong, brave, independent, competitive and fierce – not the weaker sex but equals with you! But, as we celebrate what should be the turn of the tide, why are you doing your absolute best to crush our spirit?

Men, in your seats of power, you pass laws that offer more protection to cows than women and still think you are fit to talk of progress. You do not dole out punishment to those of your gender guilty of marital rape. Would you force such “duty” on your own wives and daughters? There is no place of refuge or solace for women who have been tortured, physically and mentally, by other men like you. Do you not remember that you made a vow to protect your wife when the two of you made your way around the sacred fire? How can you not see that the weeping woman could be her? There is no justice for women who are victims of heinous crimes but, if that wasn’t bad enough, you give her no sympathy either, finding ways to pin the blame on her instead! Like the way she is dressed or how late in the evening she is out or that she is with a male friend should make a difference when it comes to her safety… Are you not afraid that one day that nameless faceless woman could easily be your daughter? Things have deteriorated so much that it is now unsafe even for our children to play outside because there are those of your “superior” gender with an insatiable hunger for the unthinkable. How do you sleep at night?

Men, will you ever see us as your equals or will we forever be just objects that you can use and discard?

Men, do you not see that because of acts so brutal, so cruel and so barbaric committed by some of your gender, all of you are looked at with suspicion and distrust? That unless you change your attitude, more incidents like the ones that have already shocked the world will continue to take place? That we must teach our sons to treat our women respectfully? Do you not see that the drastic, immediate change should have taken place yesterday?

Dear Men, I was angry…once. Now,  I am just disappointed.

Thank you for giving us so much to celebrate this women’s day…

Could that be love?

She barely knew him but he insisted that he loved her before he proceeded to leave scars on her that could never be erased and then running away, but, she had used her the only thing she had – long nails, to leave marks too, to identify him to the police and ensure justice was served.

******

For all the women who have been harassed by men who claim to be in love with them only to have acid thrown in their faces or be raped or worse when they have not reciprocated the same kind of obsessive “love“…

This post is a part of a 55-Fiction celebration on Write Tribe.

Write Tribe

Violence Against Women – It’s a men’s issue

Jackson Katz provides a possible solution to some of the problems I mentioned and questions I asked in an earlier post.

I stumbled upon this video by accident and I’m glad I stopped to watch. Like Katz, I hope that one day, we have both men and women who don’t just laugh when their friends say something degrading about women but speak out to become leaders of change.

Enough said…please watch.

Woes of women

This morning, there was an article in the newspaper about a woman who was slapped by a relatively high ranking police officer for protesting against the brutal rape of a five year old child in the national capital. You tell me which part of that headline you find most appalling…

I’m from India and most of the time, I’m super proud to be Indian. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Am I patriotic? Probably not. I doubt I would lay down my life for the country or anything, but, I’m loyal to India…except when I read or hear or watch how absolutely miserably we fare when it comes to dealing with crimes against women.

I am aware that women and children (both boys and girls) are molested, abused and raped everywhere in the world, but, somehow, the fact that every second article in the newspaper is about some woman in some city in the country being taken advantage of worries the hell out of me…further, the fact that so many of those rapes are of minors freaks me out completely.

Why is it that when the victim is female, she is not given comfort and assurance that the culprit will be punished severely? Why is she instead treated like somehow the whole thing is her fault? For going to the police to report a rape, women are often ridiculed or beaten up or jailed and in some of the more extreme cases even ostracized from the towns they live in while the jackasses who can’t keep it in their pants roam around freely able to cause others emotional and physical trauma at will. Most of the girls I know have been groped, pinched, kissed or worse by absolutely strange men at least once in their life so far. It is likely that it will happen again. The occurrence of the event is bad enough, but, what is worse is that most of the girls I know (myself included) have accepted it as routine and done nothing about it. But, what would we do? When rapes are not treated seriously enough, how could something as small as a kiss?

Last year, the rape of one young girl made the headlines for weeks together and through her suffering and finally death, the country woke up and announced more stringent laws dealing with heinous crimes of all types. But, men here don’t seem to be afraid of laws like that. They still go on doing what they are doing without fear of capture or punishment.

How have we become a society that couldn’t care less about our women? How do the males of our species believe it’s alright to do the things they do to children, in so many disgusting cases their own? How do those in authority blame the way women dress for molestation? How can an elected neanderthal cite the rise in fast food consumption as the cause for increase in the number of rapes in his constituency?? How do our politicians recommend decrease in the legal age for marriage as a solution to the rape problem? How is marrying the man who raped you justice? Why are these sort of terrible crimes unpunished or not given strict enough punishment? WHAT THE HELL ARE WE TEACHING OUR MEN???

I have so many angry questions and not nearly enough answers….sigh…I wish we lived in a safer India…a safer world…one where it wasn’t so hard to be a woman…